Warning! Dangerous Power Zapping Words

I’ve noticed an interesting phenomenon happening lately, and I’m wondering if we’ve got another epidemic, similar to the “I’m so busy” epidemic, on our hands?  This one goes by the name of, “Oh, you just wait”.

Over the last few weeks this has been happening more and more.  I’ll be chatting with a woman, catching up on what’s going on in our lives.  Unfortunately, the conversation begins to go as so many others do, and she’ll start talking about her troubles.  She laments about her achy hip, her crazy schedule of running her kids here and there, her husband that golfs too much, or her failing memory. 

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’ll be the first one there for a friend in need, but when the same old story keep repeating itself, that’s when I know the real source of the problem.  And it’s bad enough to have to listen to the same victim story over and over again, but just recently I’ve noticed a new twist; the conversation concludes in a way that I find completely unacceptable. 

As their story comes to an end, they wrap it up with the words, “Oh, you just wait,” as if to imply that all their problems will soon be mine as I get older, as I am married longer, as my kids become teenagers.

The first time it happened I barely noticed those words, the next time I felt a subtle twinge in my gut, by the fourth or fifth time I knew we had a dangerous trend gaining popularity...some real personal-power zapping words!  I think this is ruffling my feathers for two reasons.  First, these women are giving away their power to make a change, believing that their current situation is just their luck and in no way a representation of past choices.  And second, they are attempting to taking away the power of another (i.e. mine); trying to persuade another to believe that they can’t have a different outcome for their life. 

They say, “Misery loves company,” and maybe that’s what’s at the core of this issue.  I would like your opinion...Have you been noticing the “Oh, you just wait...” epidemic spreading among the women you know?  How do you feel about what those words imply for your life?  Do you choose to ignore the phrase, or do you choose to respond, and how do you do so in an empowering way?  Please leave your comments and at the very least, consider yourself warned of these seemingly harmless, yet dangerous words, lurking among us.

Becky,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
"Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life, but define yourself." ~Harvey S. Firestone

Passion and Purpose: Isn’t There an Easier Way?

In this day of instant everything, so many are seeking a quick way to do, be and have it “now”.  As an organization that helps women find their passions and live life on purpose, we’ve heard it all…Isn’t there a book I can read?  Can I find it on Google?  Don’t they have an assessment for that?

Your passions and your divine assignment for living aren’t something you can learn in a book or find in an internet search, although clues can be found there.  Truly living “on purpose” is a process that requires commitment, self-reflection and determination.  You might even say that when it comes to passion and purpose, living your passion is equally important to finding it.  That adage, “it’s not just the destination, it’s the journey,” definitely applies.

You can’t wait for your passions to reveal themselves to you, or for your life purpose to knock on the door; it’s referred to “pursuing your passion” for a reason.   You have to get out there and try new things, experience different adventures, meet new people, and become aware of new causes, for every aspect of your uniqueness to come together in just the right way.  While this might sound complicated, it doesn’t have to be; with the right perspective, getting there is most of the fun!

It does take creativity though, and dedication.  It’s much easier to let the day-to-day lead you through life.  So, where does one find the inspiration to try new things on the journey to passionate, empowered and purposeful living?

The first place we recommend is your “bucket list”.  Soulspring Groups’ members have several pages in their Soulspring Journal which are dedicated to creating a list of things they want to do before they die (101 to be exact).  We’ve heard of women dedicating themselves to knocking one thing off their list every week!  That’s a pretty aggressive goal, but imagine the thrill!

Another great source can be found on Soulspring Groups’ Facebook page.  Each Friday on Facebook is Springboard Friday; a day where we post a simple activity to carry out (or plan for in the future).  We’ve provided the planning tools, too!  Followers of our page can download them via or Empowerment & Fun tab.

Past activities have included learning CPR.  It’s a skill we all should know and there’s a sense of security that comes with being prepared for an emergency.  Perhaps taking a CPR class could uncover a passion for emergency response?

We also suggested becoming more aware of the nighttime skies.  Learning about the stars is not only fun and interesting; a focus skyward gives us a sense of the greatness around us.  Perhaps being able to identify the constellations would inspire a passion for astrology, or spark a passion in your child for science and space?

Debating on where to go on your summer vacation?  One recent Springboard Friday post suggested throwing a dart at a map and traveling to that destination.  The map could be of your country or state, or even a local map that’s closer to home.  Who knows what you might stumble upon on your adventure…a new company or business you didn’t know existed, a historical site, a remote piece of nature…Each could be a doorway to a new purpose or passion for your life.

It’s time to stop your search for the easy way to discover your passions and the quickest route to your life purpose.  Instead put more attention on what is revealed to you along the way...Take some time to get lost and you might just find yourself.  The lessons, excitement and connections you make on your journey through life will reveal your purpose in due time…that is, if you’re willing to get your hands dirty and start really living.  You can get started right now by making a point to stop by Soulspring Groups’ page on Facebook this Friday for a new passion quest assignment you can get on the calendar for next weekend.

The Soul Sisters

Soulspiration of the Week:“I am here for a purpose and that purpose is to grow into a mountain, not to shrink to a grain of sand. Henceforth will I apply ALL my efforts to become the highest mountain of all and I will strain my potential until it cries for mercy.” ~Og Mandino

The Question Empowered Women Ask: What Time is It?

Did you wake up this morning with the same question on your mind as me (which, by the way, also happens to be the number-one ranking Google search for today)?  That question is...

“What time is it?”

In our part of the world it’s Day Light Savings Time and that means the first order of the day is to go from room to room and turn our clocks ahead by one hour.  While it means we’ve somehow lost an hour overnight, and we’ll be waking up in darkness tomorrow morning, we’ll benefit by receiving an extra hour of daylight each night (until we turn our clocks back by an hour this fall).

I’ve never really embraced the whole concept.  While you wouldn’t think an hour would make much difference, to my body it does.  Bedtime, and more importantly, mealtimes, don’t feel quite right for a few weeks.  Some actually refuse to make the change and continue to live life on “real time”, but to me it would be confusing to constantly have to convert “my time” and “your time” with every appointment and interaction (throw a different time zone in the mix and we would really be in trouble!).  No, this would never work for me.  I like to know what time it is.

So instead I use this time in the spring and fall to look deeper into that question.  I’ve decided it’s a question that every empowered woman should ask on a regular basis.  It’s actually quite powerful to be still, to get centered, to be open, and then to ask, “What time is it?”  I’ve often been surprised by the answer I hear within my body...within my heart...within my soul.

And so I would encourage you to ask yourself the same question this week.  Perhaps you’ll realize it’s time to...

Forgive and forget.
Stand up for yourself.
Do what’s right.
Ask for help.
Follow your intuition.
Choose a different path.
Say those words.
Make a change for the better.
Live out your passion.
Place that call.
Face your fear.
Give yourself a break.
Take a risk.
Go for it.

Kim,
Sister of Soul

P.S. For another prospective on time (and timing), read “Does Anyone Really Know What Time It Is”.  The hour of the day doesn’t really mean much; when it comes to time, isn’t “timing” more important?

Soulspiration of the Week:
“Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”  ~Steve Jobs

How to Help When the Worst Happens

Life if full of blessings, yet one thing is inevitable; tragedies and challenges can strike at any time.  Financial challenges, the loss of a job, a distressing health diagnosis, or the death of a loved one, can be devastating for even the strongest and faithful of individuals. 

And when this happens to a coworker, family member or friend, the first question that often comes to mind is, “How can I help?”  The human spirit is amazing in this way; in the worst of times, something inside us stirs, and through this compassion we feel compelled to offer support, caring and love.
 
It’s a beautiful thing.  However, to actually make a difference in the life of another, it’s important to move beyond simply asking the “how can I help” question, and shift to taking action.  How do we do this when we truly don’t know what to do or what do say? 

Through our own experiences and mistakes, and the advice gathered from women who’ve been there, here are some tips for helping others when the worst happens.

Stay updated: If you truly care and wish to help, stay updated with the situation in any way you can.  Watch for updates on Facebook, and follow any websites that may have been set up to communicate the latest developments.

One amazing non-profit organization who is supporting families in this manner is CaringBridge.  CaringBridge provides free, private websites, which can be used as a tool for families to keep everyone updated on a loved one who is experiencing a health challenge.  As you can imagine, this method of communication can conserve time and emotional energy when families need it most, saving them from having to make multiple phone calls to relay the same information and answer the same questions over, and over, again.
 
Take action: Imagine what you might need if your household was turned upside-down, and offer support at this basic level.  Provide a frozen meal, help out with the yard work, offer housekeeping services, run errands, or babysit.  Transportation to treatments can give main caregivers a much needed break.  It’s natural to ask, “How can I help?”  Yet, with so many questions that people must face during tragic times, one more question is not what they need.  You know what needs to be done; just do it.  If you’re staying updated, you’ll be surprised at the many opportunities for assistance that will arise, especially if you’re watching for them.

Give of your gifts: We’ve all be given unique talents and strengths.  It’s precisely in these difficult times that our talents can become true gifts.  Regardless of what it is you do best, there’s surely a way to offer support in a way that makes the most of your strengths.  It needn’t be anything big or complicated; the key is to offer support in a specific way.  For example you might say, “I know right now __________ must be a challenge and I’m good at that.  If you would like, I could help by handling _________?”

Offer specific prayer: “I’m praying for you,” is a common statement made during difficult times, and if you make the offer, give it real power by making it specific.  “I’m praying for your procedure on Thursday,” for example, makes your offer much more credible and shows that you’ve been making every effort to follow the latest developments as they unfold.  As small as this may seem, it’s an authentic demonstration of your love and caring.

Watch your words: Take great care in how you choose your words at this time.  “It’s God’s plan,” or “Everything happens for a reason,” do not offer comfort and can be devastatingly painful to hear.  Many who have been there confirm that actions speak louder than words in times like these.  And, listening can often provide more comfort than anything you could ever say.  When words are needed; “I’m sorry,” and “I love you,” while simple, often provide the most comfort and strength.

If you have any dos and don’ts, based on difficult times you’ve experienced, please share them in the comment area below as a way to help us all be the strongest supporters possible to those we love.  And, please print, bookmark, or pin this post for future reference.  You never know when tragedy will befall someone you care about and with this guide you can lead an effort of real and helpful support.

The Soul Sisters

Soulspiration of the Week:“I am only one, but I am one.  I cannot do everything, but I can do something.  And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do.”   ~Edward Everett Hale