Women’s Empowerment Tip: What Are The Deeper Issues Behind Your Lack of Time?

Check in with any woman and the odds are pretty good that she’s busy, overwhelmed and living life fast! We’re known to have bouts of overwhelm ourselves, and any time we share a time management tip, you devour them in the hope of finally finding the secret to your challenges with time!

Unfortunately, it takes more than a quick tip. Often there are deep-seated issues that fuel our feelings of overwhelm, and until we get clear on what those issues are and resolve them, there’s not a scheduler, a calendar, or a piece of software or technology, that is going to solve our challenges with time. This requires us to honestly answer some hard questions…5 questions actually.

1. What are my top 5 values? Your values are the key to many time challenges. For example, if your highest value is family, but you’re spending 80 hours a week at work, are you going to feel balanced? Knowing what your highest values are is extremely important to uncovering what’s working and what’s not about how you manage yourself in relation to time. If you can get clear on this, you will be amazed at how the answers to your time challenges will become clear. Suddenly you’ll know where you need to adjust your schedule and to-do list; all the hard decisions you were forced to make about time before, become easier because you now know what’s important!

2. What are the top 5 goals for my life? I know what you’re thinking, “I don’t even have time to check my email let alone focus on my life goals right now!” That kind of thinking is going to lead you to waking up one day and realizing that life has gotten away from you. What you think about, you bring about…and if your life’s goals aren’t in your consciousness, you’re going to look back someday with regrets. You don’t need to add your goals to your schedule (not yet anyway), but you must list out what they are before you can be in alignment with how you spend your time.

3. What am I avoiding? You’re busy, we get that. But if you investigate further into where your time is being spent, you may find it’s on the wrong things: time wasters and things that aren’t important. We quickly say yes, when we should say no. We do what’s easy, instead of what’s right. We focus our efforts on what pleases others, instead of what pleases us. So what is it for you? What are you avoiding? Are you avoiding the unpleasant conversation, the difficult decision, the hard choice, your own power? It’s a very important question to answer.

4. How much time do I need? Seems like a silly question but an important one if you hear yourself wishing for time. If time has been your excuse for not perusing your passion, goal or dream, you must understand that time is a lot like money. If you’re going to attract more, you have to show that you can handle the responsibility, that you have a plan, you’ll use it wisely, and put it to good use. If you’re just going to fill your time with more busy-work and nothing truly important, what’s the point? So what’s the big monkey on your back and how much time do you need to work it? Put a number to that. Finding the time then becomes easier.

5. What is the 1 thing I know I need to do to handle time better that I keep putting off? We all know the answers, don’t we? We don’t always like the answer though…we let our fears get in the way and keep the answers buried, and believe it or not, keep ourselves busy and occupied to avoid them! Still, if you can answer this question honestly you’ve made an amazing breakthrough because you’ve got your answer and a starting point for change. The key is being honest with yourself, and getting over the fear that goes along with it.

Kim,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
"Now is the only time there is. Make your now wow, your minutes miracles, and your days pay. Your life will have been magnificently lived and invested, and when you die you will have made a difference." ~Mark Victor Hansen

Choices Suck

It’s great to have a choice, right? I mean, the power of choice is one of our most precious freedoms. It’s what separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom after all. That’s what we tell ourselves anyway.

The reality of the situation…Well, I’m going to venture to say that most people actually hate choices, and avoid making them at every opportunity. Ultimately, it’s the choices we make that put the responsibility in our lives, and our own happiness squarely on our shoulders.

Everything in life is a choice left to us; the job we accept, the spouse we marry, the schedules we keep. But what do we tend to do? We make choices that are not right for us. We choose what society thinks is right, what our husband thinks is right, or what our children think is right. And that’s where it begins…Instead of choice being one of our greatest freedoms it becomes one of our strongest captors.

We blame our circumstances and situations for our problems and hardships because it’s easier if we pretend that we don’t have a choice in the matter. Instead of becoming the hero of our own story we become the victim; full of anger, complaints, resentment, and sadness.

We tell ourselves that for one reason or another, we aren’t able to make the choices that others are able to make. They’re lucky or special and we’re the ones that got stuck with what we got. Somehow we confused making “tough” choices with having “no” choices and as a result we do what’s easy, play it safe, try to make (or keep) others happy, and instead of loving choices…we hate them.

It’s time to exercise your freedom to choose and to learn to love every opportunity you have to make a conscious, honest choice, whether it is difficult or otherwise. It’s the only path to fulfilling your wildest dreams!

So you’ve got a decision to make...You can either read this post, applying the message to your own life, and start making conscious and powerful choices, or you can choose to skim this text and quickly decide that your life is different and this lesson doesn’t apply to you. The choice is yours. Which will it be?

Becky,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
"Our dilemma is that we hate change and love it at the same time; what we really want is for things to remain the same but get better." ~Sydney J. Harris

Not Weird, but Wise!

I am fortunate to work with such a diverse group of women. All of varying ages, personalities, backgrounds, and experiences; it sounds a lot like the Soulspring Groups concept, I know. Although, much time is spent as it should be, on the work at hand, quite often tidbits of advice are exchanged while on the clock.

One instance in particular stands out from the past week. As I was working at my desk I overheard a conversation happening outside my door. The younger of two women was describing a situation that she was experiencing with her in-laws. I could tell she was obviously angered by the situation. Like many of us, she was letting the emotions take over and was losing the focus of the big picture...the long term results. The older women confidently stated, “You have to let it go – for your kids and your husband’s sake, it’s best to let it blow over…and it will in time!” I muttered to myself, “Good for her, that advice was spot on!” The younger woman didn’t much like that advice. It was obvious she was hoping for the green light to call her in-laws and tell them a thing or two. Knowing she wasn’t going to receive the message she was seeking, she went on her way. I secretly hoped she would reconsider the advice, however.

The older woman then popped her head in my office, knowing that their conversation had been overheard. She said, “I guess I’m just getting weird in my old age!” I replied, “I wouldn’t call that weird….I’d call that wise!” She gave me a smile and said, “I’d never thought of it that way…”

Do we really buy into the old adage, “Wise beyond our years”? Every single day we are faced with numerous new challenges, new tests, and new opportunities. And everyday we figure out how to deal with each thing that comes our way with style and grace. We learn from the experience itself. We constantly try new things to find out what works and what doesn’t. Give yourself some credit for the gained knowledge that comes at the end of each day.  You truly are "Wise beyond your years!"

Jenny,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:

“We learn wisdom from failure much more than from success. We often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do; and probably he who never made a mistake, never made a discovery.” ~Samuel Smiles

Strength in Rank

My sisters and I were blessed once again to attend an annual women’s faith conference with several dear friends this past weekend.  The retreat is always amazing and this year didn’t disappoint; it was filled with great speakers, workshops, and conversation.  One of our favorite speakers is always Susie Larson.  This year, during her “Taking Back Your Land” workshop she made a powerful point that we found particularly inspiring as we finalize the content and training materials for our upcoming Self-Worth: Finding the Value in YOU Tele-Class.

As women we sometimes forget that we’re all on the same team. At the end of the day, after we leave behind the labels, we are all joined together as humans. We stand in rank, no one better than another; all beautifully complete with our own set of virtues, imperfections, strengths, and weaknesses. Standing together, linked arm in arm, this is when we’re at our strongest.

Standing there together, each unique in our own way, Susie says, "We are more alike than we often care to admit.  Our main similarity is that each feels imperfect in some way. "

No matter who we are we have struggled with things about ourselves; our habits, our perceptions, our idiosyncrasies, our weight, or our value. We’re all guilty of negative self-talk or of taking to heart the critical comments spoken from some wounded individual. Instead of locking arms and standing up to those voices in unified formation, we listen to the voices that say we’re not worth enough, not good enough, not smart enough. Instead of standing strong together, we step out of rank and find ourselves alone.

Why would we step away from the safety of our support network? We step out because we think that’s it only us, and as we do we begin to believe those voices and feel vulnerable, insignificant, and worthless.

Self-worth is the foundation by which you will build up your power and your life. If you’re in need of a self-worth boost, you won’t want to miss our free tele-training event! See details below.

Becky,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
“Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on.” ~Unknown

At Soulspring Groups we’ve declared 2011 “The Year of Self”. From self-esteem and self-image, to self-care and self-discovery; we’ll be bringing you a series of reflective training sessions focused on the most interesting of topics: YOU!

When you think about “you”, what comes to mind? Do you glow with pride for your successes, or instantly recall every mistake and misstep? Do you live life with guts and gusto, or feel undeserving of the abundance available to you?

Living a rich life has little to do with net-worth and everything to do with self-worth. Your personal value is a direct result of your self-esteem and beliefs about your deservedness. It’s a sad reality that many women suffer from low esteem and consider themselves inferior to others. Don’t you think it’s time you realize your true value and embrace the best life has to offer?

Well we do! Don’t surrender another day to anxiety, worry, regret, dissatisfaction, or inadequacy! Join us as we reveal powerful strategies to boost your self-worth and self-esteem. Prepare to tap into your inner power, and expose the value of YOU!

Self-Worth: Finding the Value in YOU

DATE: Monday, March 14, 2011 at 7:00 p.m. CST

LOCATION: In the Soulspring Tele-classroom

FEE: It's FREE*! We invite you to be our guest!

*Long distance charges apply where applicable.

Register today in our Soul Store!

 

You will receive your tele-classroom access code and training materials
 via email prior to the training call.

Life’s Lessons in your Email’s Inbox?

You know those “FW:” emails? The ones that clutter up your inbox? The ones that require you to forward them to 10 of your closest friends or suffer some horrible consequence, thus perpetuating the cycle of the “FW:”?

I know, they can be annoying but curiosity gets the best of me every time I see one. While the time management experts will tell you to immediately hit “delete”, I just can’t bring myself to do it. What if there’s some important message, some life lesson, some clue to my purpose hidden for me within the text?

And so I read, on the quest to discover some piece of treasure buried within the typed words, and every so often I find it. It’s an exciting moment when you stumble upon a story that touches you to your heart, which is what the following parable did for me. Hopefully as you read it, its lesson will touch you as well. No need to forward to your 10 closest friends; nothing bad will happen as a result if you don’t. On the other hand, if you think the story will warm their heart, feel free to share the link to this post.

Enjoy!

Kim,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
Once upon a time on an island, there lived all the feelings and emotions: Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge, and all of the others, including Love. One day it was announced to them that the island would sink, so all constructed boats and left.

All that is except for Love; Love wanted to hold out until the last possible moment. But as the island was becoming nearly submerged, Love decided to ask for help.

Richness was passing by Love in a boat. Love said, "Richness, can you take me with you?" Richness answered, "Sorry Love, I can't. There is a lot of gold and silver in my boat and so there is no place here for you."

Next, Love asked Vanity, who was also sailing by, for help. Vanity was ready with the same answer, "I can't help you, Love. You are all wet and might damage my boat.”

Sadness was close by so Love asked, "Sadness, take me along with you."

"I’m sorry, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!" was Sadness’ sullen reply.

Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so preoccupied with her happiness that she did not even hear when Love called her.

Suddenly, there was a voice, "Come, Love, I will take you." It was an elder. An overjoyed Love jumped up into the boat and in the process forgot to ask where they were going. When they arrived at a dry land, the elder went her own way.

Realizing how much was owed to the elder, Love asked Knowledge, another elder, "Who was that who helped me?"

"It was Time," Knowledge answered. "Time?" thought Love. Then, as if reading the face of Love, Knowledge smiled and answered, "Because only Time is capable of understanding how valuable Love is." ~Unknown

Jump Ball!

I’ve spent the past two months battling a very common physical condition affectionately known as bleacher butt. After years of waiting, our daughter finally reached the required age where she could begin her youth basketball career. As the first official season to play the sport against another team, keeping score, and tracking fouls just like the big leagues got underway, she realized it was just what she was hoping for. It involved everything she loved….competition, ball handling, fast-paced action, and of course social time with her teammates. It wasn’t quite the same as one-on-one with her brother on their make-shift half court in the garage; nonetheless, she was in heaven.

It was during that very first game that I noticed a yet to be learned skill; the concept of fighting for that jump ball hadn’t come alive just yet. Our girls were still displaying those first rules of the playground that we as parents tried so hard to teach them when they were young. We’d closely watch the interaction between the children, and promptly step in when our child would try to claim a toy that another was playing with. We’d find ourselves repeating over and over again, “Don’t take toys away from other kids.” And now, how many years later, we see them doing just as we taught them on the court…we should be so proud. At the first sense that the other team would get their hands on the ball our girls would instinctively let go, giving up an opportunity for a “jump ball”; a possession change. They were just doing what they knew, what was polite, what they felt was the right thing to do.

But, let’s take a timeout and consider the power of this important skill. As we go through life and begin to realize our dreams and goals, how many of us simply let go and give up the control when someone comes by and starts to steal it away? Do we give up too easily and relinquish an opportunity all together, or do we firmly plant our feet and hold on tight with both hands in order to show them we’ve got the confidence to stay in the game? In order to reach the goals we set for ourselves we’ve got to learn to stay with those “jump ball” situations.

Now fast forward a mere two months to the last game of the season. It was obvious that somewhere along the way our girls realized the benefits that come from a “jump ball” situation. They confidently wrapped their arms around the ball and hung on with all their might. At the end of the game they had a ton of possession changes and a win under their belt. It was empowering to see the fearless look on their faces as they sought out the opportunities to go after the ball and most importantly held on tight until the whistle blew; signaling a JUMP BALL!

Yes, my butt will soon be back to normal. It was certainly a season that we’ll remember. It wasn’t about tracking wins and losses, but a season for the entire team to learn the basics, understand the rules, master the skills, and gain the confidence that will benefit them for the rest of their lives. And, we adults may have even learned a thing or two along the way. Remember to plant your feet, wrap your arms around that dream and hang on with all your might until you hear the sound of that whistle signaling you did it!

Jenny,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of Week:

A winner is someone who recognizes his God-given talents, works his tail off to develop them into skills, and uses these skills to accomplish his goals. ~ Larry Bird

I’ve Got Some Bad News and Good News

How many times have we heard that statement? We’re reluctant to hear the bad news but at the same time so relieved to hear there’s some good in the mix. The only question that remains is which to hear first.

Recently I had a revelation; a big ah-ha moment that has changed forever the way I think about the “good news-bad news” phenomenon. What if the “bad” news was also the “good” news? Bear with me a moment and let me roll out my thought process…

A few months ago when I was in Tampa for the “I Can Do It” seminar I called home to check in with the hubby. I could sense immediately that something was wrong and sure enough his mother had fallen and broken her leg. Mom celebrated her 86th birthday in August and has been struggling with foot and leg pain for a while now, and her eyesight has been deteriorating as well; all a result of diabetes. Getting around was a challenge for her already and now a broken leg…yes, this was definitely bad news.

However, I was already in day three of my “I Can Do It” experience. I had received a hug and a kiss from Wayne Dyer, saw Louise Hay gush over pictures of my niece and nephew, heard the greatest motivational speakers share about God’s hand in our lives and His miracles (not their rarity, but their frequency), and saw scientific evidence proving the existence of Divine support (as if I needed more). The underlying message throughout the event was that we are part of a greater plan, contributing to a greater purpose, supported and loved by a greater Power. Thus, everything that happens, happens for a reason.

But what could possibly be the reason for my mother-in-law having to suffer yet another blow to her health? Well…with the broken bone and surgery to repair it, Mom will be getting some physical therapy; I’m sure that will contribute to her ability to get around in a more stable fashion in the future. Maybe eating meals and taking her medications under the supervision of medical staff will improve her health overall. And Dad…well the best of Dad comes out in times like these. At the age of 90, his Marine training kicks in and…how shall I say it…everything from meals to laundry becomes a little more regimented.

Wow, maybe some “good” could come out of this. I started to think back at other “bad” experiences from my past and found that even the “worst of the worst” of them had set into motion events that in hindsight support my happiness today.

From our vantage point it’s impossible for us to see the greater plan for our lives. We must stop labeling anything as “bad” because it might actually be for our “good”. What if instead we imagine the best that could arise from the situation and look for the lesson or gift that is hiding there for us?

O.k., humor me one last time… “I’ve got good news and bad news. The bad news IS the good news.”

Kim,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
“If you don't change your beliefs, your life will be like this forever. Is that good news?” ~ W. Somerset Maugham