A New Self-Care Motivation

I had the most amazing “ah-ha” moment a few weeks ago while I was attending the “I Can Do It” conference in Tampa. Although I had several of these moments at the conference, I feel most compelled to share this one. I can see how it really relates to all of us as women (and especially as mothers) as we tend to fall more into the category of “giving” rather than “receiving”.

My moment of enlightenment happened during a break-out session with author, coach and speaker Cheryl Richardson. She asked the audience what seemed to be a simple question, “How many of you feel you would have had better childhoods if your own mother would have devoted more time to her personal self-care?” And the hands went up. As I looked around the room of a couple hundred people there were only a handful that did not have their hands raised.

Wow, I had never thought about it that way! When asked about self-care I’m quick to say, “Oh, yeah, that’s so important.” But I’m sure I’m not alone in that my own time seems to come last; after the cooking, cleaning, homework, laundry, care-giving, etc. My own self-care is something I do when I have “extra time”, and of course there is rarely such a thing as “extra time”. So I carry on, day in and day out, not doing the self-giving activities that would rejuvenate my patience, happiness, spirit, and overall mood.

I knew self-care was important, but never really thought it was THAT important. Now, for the first time, I’m realizing that my own self-care would contribute to my children having a better childhood. As a mother, isn’t that ultimately what I want? With all the hands raised that day the chances that my children, and your children, will feel the same way if asked that question in their adulthood seems extremely likely, unless of course we change our ways.

So here I go…I’m devoting more time for myself. Perhaps a weekly bubble bath, some time spent each evening reading or writing in my journal, date night with my husband, and maybe the kids need to take more trips to Grandma’s house. It’s about time I finally make some changes in this area. My children’s happiness depends on it!

So what do you say? Who’s with me?!

Becky,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
"When you can lovingly be present to yourself, your presence to others takes on a deeper quality also.” ~MacRina Wiederkehr

Message from my Christmas Angel

We’ve come upon it; that time of the year. Its official “The Holidays” are here. We’ve got Thanksgiving under our belt…literally, and as we round the bend toward December the big push begins. The lists of to-do’s start to grow and you now remember why you opted for the calendar with such big boxes a mere 12 months ago. Let’s face it; Christmastime is a busy time.

I was pondering that very issue last weekend. Exhausted from a day of cleaning in preparation for Thanksgiving, I couldn’t wait for the opportunity to put my feet up for the evening. I had a few dishes to wash and then I was home free. And that’s when it happened….in walked my angel. Of course I didn’t think that at the time, I certainly wasn’t expecting her. She floated in and spoke just a few words. It wasn’t exactly what she said that was so touching, but the sweet twinkle in her eye that tugged at my heart; there was something familiar about it. She opened her precious mouth to ask me one simple question, “Mom, can we put the Christmas tree up now?”

I will be the first to admit that I didn’t handle it well. Without even thinking I quickly responded, “Are you kidding? No!” And that’s when I saw the spark begin to fade. I took a deep breath and soon realized from where I had known that bright twinkle of excitement. Once upon a time I held the same elation for Christmas time. (Where did that girl go? I want her back!  I thought to myself.)  Now, she is not one to give up easily. She didn’t miss a beat and commenced the negotiations. She was quite surprised when my next answer was, “OK” and quickly skipped off happily, ready to begin the assembly process.

Sending my own angel to rescue me from the “busyness” of the Season…what He wouldn’t do.

I’m happy to report we had a wonderful Thanksgiving Day. Our family gathered with food galore not commenting on the bare, yet to be finished Christmas tree in the corner. It might look bare to the untrained eye but I see it adorned in angel kisses, bright twinkling lights, and trimmed in the magic of the Season. Thank you, Christmas Angel!

Jenny,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
Gifts of time and love are surely the basic ingredients of a truly merry Christmas. ~Peg Bracken

Love, Gratitude & Giving

It’s November and I’m excited! As anyone who knows me can attest, this is my favorite time of year. To me it’s the beginning of the holiday season; a time of love, gratitude and giving.

You see, I believe that love and gratitude are the most powerful of all emotions, easily trumping fear, anger and negativity. Is there any other time of year when love, gratitude and giving are more freely expressed than during the holiday season? I think not!

So while I try to do my best throughout the year to make love, gratitude and giving a daily focus, for the holiday season I intensify my efforts. Here’s how…

Practice present time consciousness. With every activity, instead of just going through the motions, I make a conscious effort to think about what it is I’m doing, why I’m doing it, and how it’s impacting the world. For tasks like wrapping gifts and sending holiday cards, this may seem like a no-brainer. But what about paying bills and running errands? While maybe a little more challenging at first, it is possible to find the giving, love, and gratitude at their core. This practice can actually make the most monotonous of tasks quite inspiring!

Believe in divine timing. They say there are no good and no bad experiences; they are all neutral and it’s our own thoughts and beliefs that label good and bad. Try to tell yourself that while you’re stuck in traffic and late for an appointment! Yet, you can certainly look back on any “bad” experience and find some speck of “good” that came of it. At this time of year I practice trusting in divine timing; everything is as it should be at this moment in time, and all will be revealed at the perfect moment.

Be thankful for everything. Instead of complaining about the cold, be thankful for the crisp air and frosty beauty. Rather than lament your busy holiday schedule, give thanks for the friends and family who want to spend time with you. As you roll out of bed each morning, start your day with a “thank you” as your feet hit the floor, and set the tone for a wonderful day!

Be of service. It would be wonderful to spend time volunteering or somehow serving the less fortunate this time of year; it’s what the season is all about after all. But what about the everyday simple acts of service, like allowing a hurried mom to go ahead of you in the checkout line, opening the door for a stranger, shoveling the walk for an elderly neighbor. They take merely a moment, yet when given with love the ripple effect from these simple acts of service is far reaching.

They say that the holidays can be a stressful time, and I admit it certainly can be hectic. Here’s my holiday stress-busting tip just for you: Place your focus on love, gratitude, and giving, and make this time of year your favorite too.

Kim
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
“The single greatest thing you can do to change your life today would be to start being grateful for what you have right now. And the more grateful you are, the more you get." ~Oprah