Stephen Covey inspires "Habits of Highly Empowered Women"

We were saddened to hear of the passing of Stephen Covey last week at the age of 79.  We've been fans for years and avid readers of his books.  "First Things First" is a personal favorite and "The 8th Habit" confirmed for us that we were on the right track with Soulspring Groups.

Back in November he inspired one of our most popular twitter-series and blog posts, the title of which was a playful twist on his book, "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People".

Seeing his book on the shelf one day prompted us to write our version, "The 30 Habits of Highly Empowered Women". In our post we asked, "What qualities do empowered women have in common?  What is it that sets these women apart from their counterparts?"

In memory of Stephen Covey, we invite you review our list and contemplate how you might accomplish your mission and leave the world better than it was when you got here.

The 30 Habits of Highly Empowered Women

The Soul Sisters

Soulspiration of the Week:
“Our character is basically a composite of our habits. Because they are consistent, often unconscious patterns, they constantly, daily, express our character...”  ~Stephen R. Covey

Clutter and Chaos: Is Your Stuff Holding You Back?

For the last few weeks our blog posts have revolved around the theme of spring cleaning and clutter.  Spring is traditionally a time for clearing out the old and freshening up our physical surroundings, but what about our lives?  The unfinished, unused, unresolved, tolerated and disorganized in our lives can really weigh us down in every way, stealing our zest and enthusiasm for life and living, not to mention blocking us from our passions and dreams.

This isn’t a new topic for us, as we’ve shared about clutter and how excess physical, mental and emotional “stuff” can hold us back in life.  In keeping with the theme and the time of year, we share a few of our most read clutter and chaos posts from the past.

Enjoy,

The Soul Sisters

Stop the Clutter!: What clutter do you have in your life and what kind of impact would just 10 minutes make?  Read More>>

Spring Cleaning Your Life Continues with the Junk Drawer: Our lives sometimes become a “junk drawer”. We allow others to stuff us full with their schedules, their needs, and their plans. It's time to clear the junk.  Read More>>

What Does Your Purse Say About You?: The disorder that can pile up and make your life feel unorganized and overwhelming can be hiding in the most common places.  Let’s start with my purse.  Read More>>

Spring Cleaning Tip: A Lesson from a Diaper Bag: How a diaper bag inspired me to look at things in my house a little differently.  What are you holding on to, and for what reasons?  Read More>>

Spring Cleaning and Clearing Life’s Clutter

In last week’s Soul Sisters Blog post we shared about how you can lose 10 pound fast by tackling the clutter in your life.  Timing couldn’t have been better; I don’t know about you but we’re in the midst of our spring cleaning!

So why are your Soul Sisters harping on you about your piles?  Clutter wreaks havoc on personal empowerment!  It makes life more chaotic, making us feel overwhelmed and restricted.  These feelings can lead into depression, guilt and loss of esteem and confidence.  Yes, clutter IS NOT a power-booster.

But one of the hardest things about clutter, which ironically also often leads us to fall into a cycle of chaos, is the question of where to begin.  In the above video, Ellen offers some tips: “Ellen Degeneres' Spring Cleaning Tips For People Who Aren't As Good At Spring Cleaning As I Am".  While it’s always best to start any difficult chore with a laugh, we think our tips might be a little more practical.  You decide...

Where to Begin

• Understand what clutter is.  Remember, if you do not love it or use it, it's clutter.
• Approach de-cluttering your environment with the right intention; as you clear the old, you make room for the new to come into your life.
• Start small, with just one drawer, one closet, or one room.  See how it makes you feel, and how you begin to open up emotionally, as a result.
• Give yourself a set amount of time and a deadline.  You would be surprised by how much you can accomplish in just an hour of focused de-cluttering time.
• Sort things into categories (Keep, toss, donate, sell, etc.). 
• Bless each item as it's put into its appropriate category.
• Follow through with putting away, tossing, donating or selling each item within a week's time to avoid it turning into another kind of clutter!
• If you find yourself struggling with parting with your things, don't be afraid to seek out the help of an expert.

Releasing your clutter allows you to let go of old life patterns that no longer serve you, and create new and open pathways for fresh opportunities and prosperity to come into your life.  Without the clutter, these new experiences can support who you are now and the woman you are becoming.

Clearing the clutter allows you to loosen the hold material things have on you, opens your energy and sparks a sense of freedom!

The Soul Sisters

Soulspiration of the Week:

"Anyone who has ever cleaned out a closet and taken stuff to Goodwill knows how liberating it is.   You feel lighter, your mind feels clearer."  ~Cecile Andrews

How to Lose 10 Pounds Fast

How would you like to lose 10 pounds fast?  I know, silly question; who wouldn't?

The fact is we can lose 10 pounds (and more) by clearing the clutter from our lives.  Clutter is anything unfinished, unused, unresolved, tolerated and disorganized.  In today's material world it can add up fast and create an emotional and energy block that affects our lives in a variety of ways.  Clutter can impact our ability to create a life of prosperity and well-being, and affect our health, relationships, creativity, spirituality and more.

Why is it that we hold on to all our "stuff" so tightly?  The most common reason is deep seated in "fear", mainly fear of the future.  You may even be thinking, as you read this article, that you couldn't possibly get rid of this or that because you might need it someday (even though you haven't used it in years).  This is precisely the fear of which we are speaking.  Holding on to material things that we haven't used for a long time, because we may need them someday, is a negative affirmation; a lack of faith and trust that you will be provided for in the future.  This belief is actually creating that which you are most afraid; a future of lack and scarcity.

The first step to de-cluttering your environment, is to get to the core reasons why letting go is so difficult.  Contemplate the following beliefs about clutter and ask yourself what your "stuff" represents to you:

• Security: My stuff keeps me secure and makes me feel safe.
• Habit or Inherited Pattern: This is how it's always been.  This is how my parents (grandparents) did it.
• Evidence: My things are reminders of how I used to be, what I once was, how great things were then, etc.
• Unfulfilled Dreams: I need these things for my future dream, of which I haven't yet accomplished but might still do, someday.
• Sentiment: These items represent memories and better times.
• Represents Self-esteem: My things make me somebody and show I'm important.
• Responsibility: People (family) are counting on me to watch over this stuff and won't like it if I get rid of it.
• Worth: My stuff might be worth something someday.
• Environment: Throwing it away is bad for the environment.

Do any of these resonate with you?  We all have reasons for holding on to our stuff, and a few sentimental pieces tucked in a drawer to show the grandkids is harmless.  However, when the clutter gets out of hand and turns into messes, piles, disorganization, and the associated feelings and emotions that come along with it, it's time to get clearing.  After all, do you own your stuff, or does it own you? 

The Soul Sisters

Soulspiration of the Week:
"A simple life is not seeing how little we can get by with—that’s poverty—but how efficiently we can put first things first. . . . When you’re clear about your purpose and your priorities, you can painlessly discard whatever does not support these, whether it’s clutter in your cabinets or commitments on your calendar.”  ~ Victoria Moran

Soul Sisters’ Book Review: Kristine Carlson’s “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms”

Through the power of social media, and a series of coincidences (if that’s indeed what they were), we were fortunate to connect with Kristine Carlson, wife of the late Richard Carlson who authored the best selling “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff” books, three of which were co-authored by Kristina herself.  Her book, “Heartbroken Open: A Memoir Through Loss to Self-Discovery” has helped many cope with the grief of losing a loved one, members of our own families included.

So when we heard she was continuing the tradition of “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff” and writing a book for moms, we waited and followed with intense anticipation.  As followers of Kristine’s Facebook page we were continuously amazed by her deep, reflective, spiritual approach to life and living.  Authentic and vulnerable, she shares openly about the triumphs and tragedies of her life, spreading faith, hope, wisdom, and humor along the way.

We were fortunate to receive a pre-release copy of “Don't Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms: Simple Ways to Stress Less and Enjoy Your Family More” and immediately knew it was a winner; hundreds of anecdotes, lessons, wisdom and advice written specifically for moms by a mom.  Nearly every aspect of mothering and family are addressed in the book in some fashion – from self-care and taking care of yourself first, to heavier topics such as the emotional safety of our children, to the more practical topics of living “green” and teaching your children financial responsibility.  What we especially love about the book is how Kristin broke it down into 100 short chapters…clearly as a mom, she understands that time is sometimes only available in small chunks.  “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms” is easy to pick up and read whenever you get a free moment.  Plus, all the advice is simple enough that it can be easily applied to our lives immediately.  Brilliant!

True to the title, Kristine puts all anxiety, stress and pressure about motherhood into perspective.  Throughout the book important themes repeat: It’s all okay, it’s acceptable and necessary to take time for yourself, perfection is over-rated, you can seek out help from others, etc.  As moms we tend to visualize the picture of that perfect mom in our heads, and we are constantly striving for that…it’s unattainable and leaves us feeling burned out, unhappy, and feeling as though we have failed. 

Finally, the significance, magnitude and understanding of what it takes to excel at motherhood has been eloquently translated into written-word.  It’s easy for mom’s to feel underappreciated by society, as was exemplified by the back-and-forth after Hilary Rosen’s comments in regards to Ann Romney’s decision to raise her five boys as a full-time mom.  It’s gratifying to see it in writing.  Moms are the heart of the home, the leader of the family, the orchestrator of the schedules…finally someone noticed!

But is motherhood everything?  As Kristine states, “I’m still devoted to family, but I am not confined by that role.”  Many mothers get themselves into trouble by placing their entire focus on family.  They are doing themselves a disservice by underestimating the importance of their personal goals, interests and passions.  Had Kristine subscribed to that philosophy, we wouldn’t have this amazing guidebook to a more relaxed form of motherhood. 

Early on in the book, Kristine shared the oxygen mask/flight attendant metaphor.  Anyone who’s flown on an airplane and has listened to the flight attendant’s instructions will relate; “In the unlikely event that air pressure drops within the aircraft, oxygen masks will deploy from the ceiling.” You’re then instructed to put the oxygen mask on yourself before assisting others, even your children.  The logic is clear; if you’ve passed out from a lack of oxygen, you’re of no use to the people around you.  This sets the stage for the rest of the book.  Over and over again she reiterated that we, as moms, need to feed ourselves first – create a special place for ourselves in our homes, take a “mommy time-out”, plan “rest” time for ourselves each week, etc.

As women, we often seek out the advice of other women.  Here, we are receiving the advice and wisdom of one of the most understanding and grounded moms out there.  You can feel her love, energy, and sensible style with each turn of the page.  She has such an amazing soul and even if a fraction of her advice and wisdom rubs off on us, reading this book and expanding our beliefs about motherhood will make us less stressed moms raising happier kids.

“Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms” is for every mother.  The young moms will find the advice helpful in getting off on the right motherhood foot; asking for help when it’s needed, not holding yourself to crazy standards, and more.  For more experienced moms, it will remind them of how much of a feat being a mom really is and that they should be proud of their accomplishment.  It will also give them permission to reassess how things are running in the home and inspire them to make changes where they feel it’s needed. Practical parenting advice such as taking a breath before responding to a child who is testing your patience is a great reminder to all of us. 

Pick up a copy and learn for yourself how you can be happier and stress less as a mom.  Still not convinced?  Kristine had graciously allowed us to share an excerpt from the book, a portion of the chapter, “Empowered Mom”, as the feature article in our May Soulspiration e-newsletter.  We couldn’t think of a better way to commemorate Mother’s Day for our subscribers.  If you’ve yet to join our email list, please sign up today (and claim your free e-book, “50 Reasons to Believe in You”).

The Soul Sisters

Soulspiration of the Week:
Join the community of Don't Sweat Moms on Facebook!  Declare that you're a "Don't Sweat it Mom" here!

Who Do You Think You’re Fooling?

It’s the first day of April, and that day marks a rather strange holiday called April Fool’s Day; do you know it?  In the U.S., it’s a day to play practical jokes and pranks on others.  I guess there’s really no harm in a little innocent deception, as long as it’s limited to just one day.  It’s the other 364 days of the year that have us concerned.

Oh, don’t pretend you don’t know what we’re talking about...You can’t fool us!  There’s a lot of trickery going on all right, and unfortunately, we’re our own greatest jokester and the pranks are far less innocent because we’re playing with our lives.  The deceit can take on many forms including blaming, avoiding and tolerating, and it seems to be motivated by a single emotion, and that emotion is fear.

Before you write off this post as just another April Fool’s joke, are you fooling yourself with any of these?

It’s not my fault: That may be true, but it’s not anyone else’s fault either.  Aside from an act of God, we’re responsible for our personal circumstances.

Change is hard: Change is a choice.  How easy or how hard it is depends on our perspective.

I can’t: How often have you uttered this untruth?  Let’s get real here; it’s not that you can’t, it’s that you won’t.

It’s not really that important: Oh really?  Well, if it’s not that important, why does your heart leap with joy when you think about it?  Why have you been dreaming about it since childhood?  Why does a life without it make your heart break? 

It’s just how it is: It may be the current situation, but you have the power to take action and transform your reality into something better.

That’s selfish: It doesn’t matter if we’re talking about our energy, our time, or our money, if we’re depleted and running on fumes, we’re of little help to anyone.  Want to be the best you for your spouse, your kids, and your workplace?  It’s in everyone’s best interest to tend to your own needs first.

It’s time you start to see through the tricks you’re playing on yourself, step through the fear, and reserve those foolish antics for April Fool’s Day.

Kim,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:“The worst lies are the lies we tell ourselves. We live in denial of what we do, even what we think. We do this because we're afraid."  ~Richard Bach

The 30 Habits of Highly Empowered Women

While doing a little dusting in the office, I spotted a well-worn copy of Steven Covey’s classic, “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”.  This book first introduced us to concepts like the “abundance mentality” and the “upward spiral”, launching us down a path of personal development and growth, and a desire to support other women to do the same.

Seeing that title again got us thinking about the habits of highly empowered women.  What qualities do these women have in common?  What is it that sets these women apart from their counterparts?  Some lively conversation and a brainstorming session later and we came up with quite a list that inspired our Twitter-series for the month of November:  “The 30 Habits of Highly Empowered Women”.

Each day this month on Twitter we’ve been tweeting a habit that we have found that all empowered women share!  Below is a recap of our list...

1.       Empowered women know they have a mission to fulfill. They think, plan and live in accordance with their life purpose.

2.       Empowered women set aside the stereotypes and instead choose to focus on being their best and most authentic self.

3.       Empowered women know it’s o.k. to ask for what they want. They feel deserving of the best life has to offer.

4.       Empowered women have an open mind. They welcome new ideas and often a change of mind is more like a change of limiting belief.

5.       Empowered women see fear for what it is, “False Evidence Appearing Real”.

6.       Empowered women spread love and kindness wherever they go. Their open hearts attract great opportunities and wonderful people to them!

7.       Empowered women make their own self-care a top priority. They know they can’t help others if their personal energy is in short supply.

8.       Empowered women show gratitude for all the gifts in their life. It’s this gratitude that brings them abundance!

9.       Empowered women accept the differences in others. We’re all uniquely different (and equally important) after all!

10.   Empowered women surround themselves with other empowered women. They know the support of others allows them to do really great things.

11.   Empowered women close energy-sucking cycles in their lives. They know what’s important and can delegate or even dump the unnecessary.

12.   Empowered women are clear on their core values and live according to them. It’s the only way to fulfill their life’s purpose.

13.   Empowered women live a life of clarity. They know what they want to create or accomplish and they keep their eye on their goals daily.

14.   Empowered women take 100% responsibility. No matter how difficult, they always have a choice, and every decision is theirs to make.

15.   Empowered women believe anything is possible! They achieve because they believe!

16.   Empowered women recognize when things aren’t working in their lives and make the necessary course corrections to get back on track.

17.   Empowered women commit to constant and never-ending self-improvement. Knowledge is power!

18.   Empowered women put more focus and attention on the positive than the negative.

19.   Empowered women are constantly challenging their limits beliefs. They often question “why” and “why not”.

20.   Empowered women live in present time consciousness. They experience each moment to the fullest.

21.   Empowered women are honest with themselves and others. By living truthfully they will have no regrets!

22.   Empowered women “pay” themselves first. When their financial house is in order, they have more ways and means to give to the world.

23.   Empowered women empower themselves by empowering others. That’s all we’ve got to say about that!

24.   Empowered women don’t fall into playing the blame game. “If it’s to be, it’s up to me,” is their mantra!

25.   Empowered women know how to say no. They don’t let feelings of guilt or obligation keep them from what’s really important.

26.   Empowered women never, never, never give up on their dreams and goals. They believe and achieve!

27.   Empowered women have a strong relationship with their Creator, taking time for daily reflection and meditation.

28.   Empowered women live in balance; mind, body and spirit.

29.   Empowered women go over, under, around or through every challenge until they achieve their goals.

30.   Empowered women spend life doing the “right” things, instead of just “more” things.

Of course there are many, many more qualities that highly empowered women share.  What traits would have made your top habits list?  Please comment below.

The Soul Sisters

Soulspiration of the Week:

"Excellence is not a singular act, but a habit. You are what you repeatedly do.”    

~ Shaquille O'Neal

What Dis-Empowering Spells are you Under?

There are times when life is pure magic; and then there are times when the spell is on you!  We’re not talking hexes or voodoo.  The curses we’re referring to are the ones we cast on ourselves.  Below are the top 5 dis-empowering spells we see women living under and how you can break them.  

Break the Spell of Negative Thinking: Watch what you think about because often it’s what you will bring about.  Think positive, happy and grateful thoughts, and you’ll attract more of the same.  Likewise, focus on what’s wrong in the world, the deadlines at work, difficulties with the family, and you’ll find it hard to fit a good thought in edgewise!  If you’re looking to make a big impact fast, change the way you look at things.  Find the silver lining in every situation and soon your outlook will transform, as if by magic.

Break the Spell of Limiting Beliefs: Our thought patterns are formed at a young age, often inspired by influential adults and experiences during our young formative years.  Our beliefs about money, self-worth, deservedness, and more, are shaped early-on, never to be questioned again.  But question you must!  What if you belief is a lie?

Every belief that is holding you back from your best life can be converted into a new, true, and empowering belief, simply by changing your mindset.  “The Work” by Bryon Katie, offers a formula for questioning these thoughts: Is it true?  Can you absolutely know it’s true?  How do you react (what happens) when you believe that thought?  Who would you be without the thought?

Break the Spell of Blame: Have you been playing the game of “Blame and Complain”?  Well, no more pointing fingers at your parents for the way you were raised, at your spouse for not helping enough around the house, or at the boss for hating your job.  If you know there’s a problem and things aren’t working, decide to make a change and then follow through.  Nobody is in charge of your happiness but you.

Break the Spell of Mistakes: We’re all human and make mistakes.  Don’t let them hold you hostage for the rest of your life!  Think of them as experience and practice for your future.  Admit your role, make amends with those hurt (including you), and then break free from the past so it won’t screw up the present.

Break the Spell of Envy: Do you have a propensity towards a “grass is always greener” way of thinking?  If you actually had the opportunity to walk a mile in some else's shoes, you might be surprised at what you find.  If we all threw our problems into a pile, and saw ours compared side-by-side with everyone else's, we’re pretty confident we’d each grab our own back.

Kim,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
“The appearance of things change according to our emotions, and thus we see magic and beauty in them, while the magic and beauty are really in ourselves.”  ~Kahlil Gibran

Empowerment Tool: The Change Equation

I’m sure we would all agree that empowerment would come easier if we lived in a plastic bubble. Our world would be safe and totally under our control. We could go through our day and not have to deal with the driver that cuts us off, the spouse that doesn’t fold the laundry according to the approved protocol, or the negative co-worker whose main goal in life if to drag everyone down into the crab bucket. Unfortunately we don’t have that kind of isolated existence and we must interact with people of all kinds, as well as their behaviors and actions, daily.


We’re faced with obstacles, challenges, and irritations day in and day out, and if we’re not careful it’s easy to play the blame game. The areas in our life that we’re not happy with become due to someone or something else: My marriage is dead because of my husband, I hate my job because of my boss, I’m physically unhealthy because of my genetics, etc. We think that nothing can get better unless these other things change, and because changing another person or a situation that truly is out of our control is impossible, we become stuck.

But I have some fantastic news…It IS possible to change the outcome of any situation. It’s as easy as a mathematical equation and starts with changing that which is truly in your power; yourself!

Would you like to see proof?

It’s called the change equation, or simply A+B=C, as described by Dr. Catherine Birndorf, MD in her book “The Nine Rooms of Happiness”. Consider it a little empowerment tool to tuck in your belt.

A – is you, B – is the thing you are blaming (that is not in your control to change), and C – is the outcome. So you see, if you make a change to A (yourself) and leave that which is out of your control (or B) unchanged, you will still get a different end result for any challenge or difficulty you may face. Such a simple solution for becoming unstuck!

The next time you find yourself blaming, find your solution in the change equation. Experience a different result by changing yourself.

Becky,
Sister of Soul

Soul-spiration of the Week:

“Every man is the architect of his own life. He builds it just the way he wants it. However, after he has built what he wants, he sometimes decides that he doesn't like what he has built and looks for someone or something to blame instead of changing himself.” ~Sydney Madwed

The Squash Adventure

I’m not ashamed to admit that I like food. In fact, there are very few foods I won’t eat. I’m not a fan of melons and just within the last few years tomatoes, which used to be a favorite, don’t taste quite the same to me. Then there are the foods I’ve despised since childhood: lima beans and squash.

Supposedly squash tastes like “candy”, or so my parents always said. Hmmm, really? I never got that. It wasn’t just the taste; the texture was a little grainy and, how can I say…fiberous? And just seeing that orangish-golden color made me gag just a bit. Yes, squash was hands-down my least favorite food.

But something happened this weekend. I ate squash! Yes, and not only did I eat it, but I liked it too! Who knew?

My husband and I escaped over Easter weekend for some much needed “together-time”. He’s recently adopted a healthier way of eating, which includes eliminating gluten from the menu. If you’ve never considered it before, let me just say that gluten comes from wheat and many other grains, and wheat and grains are a pretty common staple for the American diet. Of course the typical breads, pastries, pastas, and cakes, all contain gluten, not to mention many sauces, gravies, soups, and the like. Even though we know the most obvious hiding places for gluten, we’re still often surprised. The rule is that if we didn’t prepare the food ourselves, we ask.

So it was on Saturday afternoon, after a wine-tasting at Chateau St. Croix, when we decide to head to St. Croix Falls for a bite at Grecco’s. They have a very eclectic menu, all freshly prepared foods; surely we would find something wonderfully (and gluten-free) there!?

Perusing the menu, everything sounded amazing, and was served on bread or thickened with flour. We asked our waitress about gluten-free options and she checked with the chef. As it turned out the chicken meatball appetizer was prepared without flour or breadcrumbs and had been a favorite among the patrons this weekend. The only problem, it was served on a layer of creamed squash. Chuck’s eyes lit up and I knew I couldn’t poo-poo the only thing on the menu that fit with his way of eating, so we ordered.

I figured I could just scrape off the squash part, but when the plate arrived my hopes were dashed. Instead of a mound of squash, like I envisioned, the meatballs were in a puddle of golden soup. It was a beautiful presentation however, and the aroma was pleasing too, and so I decided to give it a try.

The chicken was tender and juicy, perfectly seasoned. And, the squash? Creamy…smooth…buttery…delicious!

Yes, I ate the squash and I liked it. While not a death-defying feat, I felt proud for having taken the risk. Had I stuck to my childhood belief, that squash was the most despising of vegetables, I never would have experienced that tasty adventure!

And that’s when it hit me…what other childhood beliefs am I still allowing to hold me back from experiencing life to the max? I think it’s time to challenge those long-standing beliefs and re-evaluate their truth for my life. Are they beliefs of a young, insecure child, or the beliefs of a confident, empowered, adventurous woman? I get excited just thinking of the new adventures that could be in store!

Umm, I don’t think I’m quite ready for the lima beans though.

Kim,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
“Within you right now is the power to do things you never dreamed possible. This power becomes available to you just as you can change your beliefs.” ~Maxwell Maltz

Get Reacquainted With Your Imagination

My four year old just entered an expressive new stage; imaginary friends. Seems as though she is very popular with these friends of the invisible sort, as she’s introduced me to about ten of them over the last week. A couple days ago I had to do everything in my power to keep from laughing as I watched her making “friends” with the knots in our dining room table. I had to be grateful though; they were very polite knots. As one knot said to the other, “Hello, my name is Evan, it’s very nice to meet you.”

At first I was a little worried thinking about how this might be a precursor to schizophrenia. As my mind wandered into the future I saw visions of critics blaming me, as the parent, for my daughter’s mental illness. But as I took a step back I realized what a special gift my four year old, and most I’m assuming, have at this age; the gift of imagination.

Children have the ability to turn a puddle into a vast ocean that takes days to cross. Or they can take the living room couch and turn it into a car, complete with front seat, back seat, and trunk. And give them a cardboard box and the possibilities are truly endless to what they can create and discover. But what happens to that imagination?

As we grow older and are faced with adult responsibilities, harsh lessons, and become more aware of reality, we lose the same kind of imagination that we all once possessed. As children, we’d fall asleep imagining all the fun things we can do the next day with the big sticks in the backyard and the old bucket in the basement. Then we’d wake up the very next day and make it happen. There was nothing holding us back. Now as adults, we daydream while stuck in traffic about our future, but just as quick as those visions come to us they are snatched away by our assumptions of what is possible.

Dr. Wayne Dyer teaches that imagination is the most important resource we have in achieving our dreams. How is it possible for us to attain something if we can’t first imagine it? Not very. We must first expand our imagination by letting our minds run wild. And then when we tap into what we really imagine for our futures, we need to believe that it is possible; question every corrupting thought you have.

And if your “imaginator” is still broke…seek out the help of a 4 year old!

Becky,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
“Without leaps of imagination, or dreaming, we lose the excitement of possibilities. Dreaming, after all, is a form of planning.” ~ Gloria Steinman

The Power of Believing

It’s been years, as I’m sure it has been for most of you, since I’ve watched the movie E.T. And to be honest I don’t remember much of the details of the film. I came across a quote from the movie earlier today that struck a chord with me though. At some point in the movie (I don’t even recall when) Elliot says to E.T., “I'll believe in you all my life.”

OK, so yes, I feel a little silly getting emotional over a line from an 80's movie but when I stop to think about this line deeper it occurs to me that this is exactly what each of us need. We all need someone to believe in us all their lives. As I think back through the years there are a handful of people who I will always remember for believing in me. They stand out the most because they believed for no reason at all. They didn’t have a vested interest in my success or failure but they still cheered me on every step of the way.

So what about the people in your life? Who around you could use these words of encouragement from you; your spouse, your children, a friend? Take some time today to drop an email or a card telling these loved ones that you believe in them and see what a difference it can make!

Becky,
Sister of Soul

Soul-spiration of the Week:
“Anyone who ever gave you confidence, you owe them a lot.” ~Truman Capote, Breakfast at Tiffany's, 1958, spoken by the character Holly Golightly

Is there a Santa Claus?

I don’t remember specifically when I realized that there was no real guy, dressed in red, assisted by elves, who rode around the world in a sleigh powered by flying reindeer? If I had to guess, I would say I was around 10 years old. I have 3 younger siblings who believed and carried the idea of the real physical Santa on for several years after me. I guess pretending with them, and for them, kept the idea alive for me somewhat.

Now fast forward a number of years. I am now a mom; my son and daughter are at the pivotal ages of “believing” and “kinda sorta believing, but beginning to question”; ages 9 & 12, respectfully. I can’t say that they haven’t inquired about the idea of a Santa who receives their letters every year. In fact, my son asked me a couple weeks ago, “Mom, do you believe in Santa?” I answered him truthfully, “I believe in the magic of Christmas. This is the time of year when Christmas angels make miracles happen. Whatever you believe in your heart is the true spirit of the Season.” He must have been satisfied with that answer because he does still 100% believes in Santa. And, I thank God that he didn’t ask me, “Mom, is there really a Santa?” instead. I don’t know how I would’ve answered that question. Talk about your Christmas miracles.

It won’t be long before these two give into the peer pressures of their friends and this one Christmas secret will soon be a memory. Yes, this might just be the last year of tip-toeing their presents under the tree in the middle of the night. With that said, this year I will treasure the moment seeing the magic in their eyes, and excitement on their faces when they finally see the gifts under the tree. Although, Santa may not stop at our house next year, the spirit of everything Santa stands for will be forever in our home.

Now, I pray that my son doesn’t read this blog before Christmas or my goose is cooked.

Jenny,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
“Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time." ~Laura Ingalls Wilder

Giving Thanks

My sisters and I are busy preparing for this week’s Thanksgiving holiday, which has a significant meaning to us. It might surprise you to know that we are actual descendants of the first Pilgrims who joined the Wampanoag people at Plymouth for the harvest celebration we now know as Thanksgiving.

Yes, Francis Cooke and his son John (you can Google them if you like), are our relatives from way back. They came across on the Mayflower, leaving Portsmouth, England in September of 1620. After several storms and close calls they anchored at Cape Cod on November 11.

It wasn’t until the next year that the first Thanksgiving was celebrated. It was a hard year and nearly half of the Pilgrims had died. Thanks to the local Indians, and their ability to speak some English, peace and trade treaties were established and special guidance was offered by the Wampanoag regarding the ways of the land.

In early autumn 1621 the 53 surviving Pilgrims held a celebration, which today we refer to as the first Thanksgiving, to show gratitude for their bounty. The local Indians attended and the event lasted three days.

I don’t mean for this blog post to be a history lesson. Dates and figures aside, the story of the Pilgrims and the first Thanksgiving is inspiring.

First of course is in keeping with our theme for the month; gratitude. After enduring a horrendous journey across the ocean, a harsh winter of cold and disease, a land that at first glance may not have appeared as bounteous as they had envisioned, and the loss of many close friends, the Pilgrims were grateful. They saw through the hardships and thanked God for His many blessings.

And then there is the reason these people even considered leaving the security of their homeland to begin with. Enduring religious and political persecution became unacceptable to them. Instead of conforming or continuing their futile protests they chose a form of peaceful action. They would set out for a new land where they could live in alignment with their own values and beliefs. They become empowered! How many of us would do the same?

While hopefully not to the same degree, we often face similar adversity in our lives each day. How many times do we endure living out of alignment with our own values and beliefs because of the views of our work (or boss), church (or church leadership), friends, and family? Do we choose to take peaceful action and move on to our own new world? Do we choose to become empowered? Or do we instead conform to the popular views in an effort to keep the peace, or complain from under the radar? Hmmm, where might we be doing this very thing in our lives right now?

Thanksgiving…Yes I’m looking forward to the turkey and stuffing and a day off work to spend with family. And, of course I’m proud to be part of the Pilgrims’ brave and hardy lineage. The Thanksgiving story however is really one of gratitude and empowerment, and for that I give thanks.

Kim,
Sister of Soul

Soulspiration of the Week:
“Heap high the board with plenteous cheer and gather to the feast, and toast the sturdy Pilgrim band whose courage never ceased.” ~ Alice W. Brotherton

Did You Plug Into It?

What an amazing and “powered up” week! Thank you to everyone who joined us for our energizing tele-class, Power Up: Overcoming Your Personal Energy Crisis! If you missed this training event, don’t worry! For a limited time you can receive a download of the recording and training materials for free! Just click here: Power Up Tele-Training Event

As with every tele-class, for each question we answer during the course of the training we seem to generate another. Believe it or not, that’s a good thing! It means we’re making breakthroughs and stirring up some new and different ideas and thoughts. Keep your questions coming!

Below are a few we received after the session. Perhaps they will address a question or two you had yourself.

Q. “Thank you for a great call! As I worked through the exercises I realized that my energy issues seem to stem from a lack of time. How do I overcome that?” R.B.

A. Great question! Time is another big issue for many women and it’s a topic we would love to dedicate a tele-training event to. To help you until that time however, we offer the following recommendations.

Pull out your Power Up training materials package. Notice that the words “energy” and “time” could almost be used interchangeably throughout. You want more time; more time for what? Until you have that question clearly answered and in writing, you won’t get control of your time issues. Likewise, you may need to overcome some pretty deep-seated “beliefs” about time to really experience a breakthrough in this area. And, the same “Frustrations” and “Incomplete Cycles” that drain your energy also eat away at your time. Try reworking these same exercises using your “time” challenges as a reference point and let us know what you discover!

Q. “I’m really having a problem with limiting beliefs. I recognize how many of my beliefs are affecting my energy levels but I’m really having a problem changing my mindset; any advice for someone like me?” T.J.

A. Yes, beliefs can be tricky but guess what? By recognizing the beliefs that are holding you back, you’ve actually made a significant breakthrough! Congratulations!

The secret to changing our limiting beliefs is found in the Pain Pleasure Principle. Associate enough “pain” with your old belief and a tremendous amount of “pleasure” to your new empowered belief, and you will begin to experience significant changes in your life! Here’s how you can use the Pain Pleasure Principle for yourself…

Step 1 ~ The Pain: Think about your limiting belief. How has this belief hurt you? What has it cost you in your life? How has it affected those closest to you?

Example Limiting Belief: “I’m always too tired.”

Pain: I can’t help but think of all the experiences and opportunities I’ve missed out on in life. Instead of spending time with friends and family, my tiredness kept me at home. Instead of pursuing the next phase in my career, I let my tiredness hold me back. That’s also hurt me and my family financially. This belief has kept me from getting the exercise I need and has actually led me to seek out convenience foods which aren’t as health for me or my family. It’s a cycle that only contributes to my feeling of being tired.

Step 2 ~ The Pleasure: Now think of your new empowered belief. What will this new belief mean to your life? What pleasure will come from it?

Example Empowering Belief: “I am powered up because I choose to be.”

Pleasure: My new belief means I’m spending more quality time with my children. We laugh and even play games together. We’re creating happy family memories I know will shape their lives into adulthood. I’m the wife, friend and mother I’ve always envisioned I would be. I’m advancing in my career and my new responsibilities suit my talents and abilities perfectly. Producing my best work energizes me! I exercise four times a week and nourish my body with healthy food. I’m losing weight without effort. I feel better and my family feels better.

With practice you will be amazed at how simple the Pain Pleasure Principle actually is, and even more surprised at how it can shift your way of thinking. It’s important to regularly review how your limiting beliefs cause you pain in your life and how your new beliefs bring you pleasure. We’re naturally wired to want pleasure in all things so what “feels” better to you is the direction your mind will naturally go. Stay committed to the process and I promise it will work. Please keep us updated on your progress!

If you have questions about overcoming your personal energy crisis, please email us at SoulSisters@SoulspringGroups.com. We promise to personally answer each and every email we receive.

Sisters of Soul
Kim, Jenny and Becky

Soulspiration of the Week:

“Life engenders life. Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich.” ~Sarah Bernhardt